How to have a spontaneous Sims baby: Broos, Broos, Broos. I know you're a single man, but I don't think I need to tell you how folks have a baby! ;-)

Lael and Drab aren't the only pair of my Sims to reproduce. It happened to Bob and Betty Newbie, only I accidentally sent both of them to work one day leaving no one at home to take care of Bunny Newbie, therefore Bunny was removed from the home by the child protective services. ::cough:: As I gasped in horror at this situation it dawned on me that this is probably why the Sims receive random phone calls asking if they want to adopt a baby. To get enough adoptable babies, they rely on stupid people like me who leave their own babies unattended. Rob observed that of course he had never had this happen to him. No wonder he stopped playing Sims; the game was not as exciting for him as it is for me!

After three Sim-days of life, if you don't get repossessed, your Sim baby becomes a child. They apparently never become adults, the ultimate in Peter Pannism.

And unlike with real children, when you tire of your cranky, whiny Sim child, you can wall them up or send them to the pool and then remove its ladders to be rid of them and no one comes to take you away! Not that I have done this, but it is mentioned on the official Sims website and is a method Phil subscribes to when kids interfere with his redecorating.

I had lunch yesterday with Rob, who is working on a building a couple of blocks away. He and his coworker met me at Westlake's food court. We glance over the filled tables, looking for a seat. "If you only find two chairs someplace, she'll stand," Rob says to the coworker, who quickly glances at me to see how I take this comment. I continue to scan the area for seats and say cheerfully, "Do you want to keep your lunch money or not?"